Don't Sweat The Small Stuff

Back in South Wales, I was on the 'cancellation' list for breast reconstruction. 
As soon as the contract with my job finished in August of this year, I knew I wouldn't be working for a while so, I told my surgeon, if another patients operation was cancelled, I would gladly step in & take their place. I was (& still am) pretty desperate to have my re-con done ASAP.
The fact that I decided to leave Wales in early August (although I didn't actually move back 'home' to Liverpool until 20th September), doesn't detract from the fact that, cancellation list or not, I was fully expecting to have had my reconstruction done by now.
So, imagine my disappointment last Wednesday, when I got all the way to the hospital, to find that my new surgeon had cancelled his diary of appointments for that day! No-one had called me to let me know! I was not happy at all!
That's an understatement actually, I felt like crying. But only for a moment. 
Cos if there's one thing that having cancer has taught me, it's to let the things that you have no control over, go right over your head. My dad - who drove me to the hospital - was ranting about it for a good half an hour but, I just can't let stupid little things get to me that much anymore. Stress is just no good for me. Or for any of us come to that.


Ok, it's a let down, a setback, a wasted journey & all in all, pretty shoddy not to be informed that I couldn't be seen that day but, there's nothing I can do about it except wait for a new appointment to be issued. Apparently, the appointments staff have got to wait until the surgeon lets them know when he will be available again before they can re-issue appointments to me & the other patients who weren't seen that day but, I've been assured that I'll be seen within the next fortnight. I'm not holding my breath though! Let's wait & see!
And, after all, surgeons are human too; maybe he's had some kind of emergency? Who knows? Whatever. Rest assured, if time starts pushing on, I'll be back on the 'phone, mithering the hell out of the appointments department until I end up with a home visit from the surgeon himself, ha ha!


It wasn't a totally wasted day though cos, on the way back from that hospital, we stopped off at a different hospital (oooh I just lurve the bloody places - NOT!), & had the chest x-ray that my GP recently referred me for. I'll get the results this week sometime.


Wow, how much of a good mood am I in this evening?!! Usually I'd be having a good old rant about this kind of palaver!
I think this just goes to show how happy I am at the moment. And, I had a Zoladex injection last Wednesday afternoon too! Those that have followed this blog will know by now that, after one of these painful injections, I'm usually verging on the suicidal by now! 
Well not this time.
I did have a 'bit of a wobble' yesterday though. 
I felt a bit down, a bit crappy & - to quote my Facebook status - it felt like 'my get up & go' had 'got up & gone'.
But then I had a comment from an FB buddy who I've only recently added to my friends' list. Another lady who is going through treatment for Breast Cancer who I 'met' whilst commenting on The Scar Project Facebook page. (There are two separate links here; one for The Scar Project site & one for it's FB page).
In reply to my status, she wrote: "Hey chick, if I find your get up & go, I'll kick it's arse & send it back!"
'Yeah!' I thought, 'Time to kick some arse!'
So, I stopped feeling sorry for myself, got up off the sofa where my bum was in danger of leaving an indentation in the leather forever &, got on with the seemingly never ending task of getting my 'new' house together. Hmmm, note to self here: If I ever decide to move house again (& let's hope it ain't gonna be for a long, long time!), I should probably get rid of all my crap before I move! I've got boxes coming out of boxes here & nowhere to put most of it!


Anyway, 'Thank you Joanne'. 
Your comment really helped yesterday, more than you know. It's just another example of how those of us in the 'breast cancer community' pick each other up. There's nobody saying 'you gotta do this' or, 'you gotta do that' or giving you grief for not feeling 100%......it's just pure support & encouragement, every step of the way. I'm so glad to 'know' so many lovely people. Pity it's not under different circumstances but hey, that's just the way it goes sometimes......


Well, I've not got much else to 'report' at the moment. I'm mad busy just putting my life back together! 
This coming Tuesday, I'll have been in Liverpool for six weeks & I can honestly say, I've not regretted my decision once. I actually wish that I'd come home sooner, like when my relationship with my daughters dad broke down. 
Saying that though, if I had come home at that time, I would never have met my fab friend Dawnie & all of the people that I met through working in Wales these past two years. 
I'm actually going back to Wales for a couple of days in mid November so I'm hoping to meet up with some of those friends while I'm there.


Anyway, it's late, I've got to go to bed, school starts again tomorrow & I do need my eight hours sleep each night! I won't be in such a good mood if I'm tired tomorrow!
Speaking of tomorrow, my little girl is hugely excited that it's 31st October! Her costume is hanging up in the wardrobe, all ready for when she gets home from school!
I quite like Hallowe'en or, Samhain as it's called in my house. Even if it does signify the start of winter.......I'm very much a sun worshipper!
Whatever you're doing, I hope you enjoy! 
Blessed be.


Love Chez. xx


P.S: I keep forgetting to mention this! Just in case you're interested &, at risk of making myself sound really bad(!), I haven't had a cigarette or an alcoholic drink for three whole weeks! 
I just don't fancy either. And, I haven't strangled anyone in the meantime! It's been quite easy up to now. I don't know what you think but, I'm quite proud of myself! Even if I am chomping nicotine gum like it's going out of fashion.......xx